Reflection

“Let the children come to me; do not stop them, for it is to such as these that the kingdom of God belongs.” (Mark 10:14)

Jesus was teaching in the land of Judea, beyond the Jordan River. Large crowds had followed him there from Galilee. Some Pharisees had approached Jesus, trying to trick him with difficult questions. Clearly, their hearts and minds weren’t open to the message that Jesus had come to share. After Jesus had answered the Pharisee’s questions, the author of Mark’s Gospel writes, “People were bringing children to him in order that he might touch them, and the disciples spoke sternly to them. But when Jesus saw this, he was indignant and said to them, “Let the children come to me; do not stop them, for it is to such as these that the kingdom of God belongs. Truly I tell you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will never enter it.’ And he took them up in his arms, laid his hands on them, and blessed them.” (Mark 10:13-16)

Clearly, this was an important teaching, as this story was included in all three of the synoptic Gospels (in Chapter 19 of Matthew’s Gospel, and in Chapter 18 of Luke’s Gospel). Now, I know that this passage is meant to speak to us of more than just ministering to children, including, in a broader sense, the importance of ministering to all of those who lack status in society. But today, I want to reflect on the radical message of Jesus, regarding children.

In the first century, a child was considered a nonperson, a nonentity, a nobody. They were thought to have very little value. There would have been no reason for a little child to be in close proximity to a great teacher such as Jesus, or even in the middle of a group of men. Children were expected to stay with the women, and keep themselves out of the way, until they grew up and could start exercising some adult responsibilities.

I can only imagine how confusing it would have been for the disciples when, according to Mark’s Gospel (Chapter 9:36-37), “Jesus brought a little child, and put it among them, and then took that child in his arms, and said to the disciples, ‘Whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me, and whoever welcomes me welcomes not me, but the one who sent me.”

To embrace a child publicly, in the first century, was to embrace that which was insignificant. But Jesus was showing the disciples what true greatness was. He was also recognizing the importance of attending to the spiritual needs of children.

I take very seriously my charge as a Pastor to minister to the spiritual needs of the children in our midst on Sunday mornings. I think it is vitally important that they know in their minds, and in their hearts, that they have a Pastor – in every sense of that word. I want them to know that I care deeply about them; about their lives; about what brings them joy, and what wakes them in the night. I want them to trust that I want to hear them; to truly listen to them, and to respond with care. Sometimes that means we’ll talk about deep topics on Sunday mornings, and sometimes we might just be silly together. In the very brief time I have with them each week, I do try to impart some meaningful message about faith and religion as I talk with the children about their week, their thoughts, and their experiences.

Someone wise once told me “if you want them to come and talk with you about the big issues of their teens and twenties, then you’ll need to listen to them when they’re telling you about the broken shoelaces of their younger years, because to them, they’re all big issues.”

From time-to-time, adults in the pews mention that they think that the Children’s Messages last too long. In response to that, I often will ask them to consider:

• The importance of the children knowing that they have a Pastor who cares about them.
• The importance of the children feeling like they belong in the sanctuary, and that this is another “home” for them.
• The difference those two things make in whether a child has any interest whatsoever in attending church, first as a child, and then later, when they have a choice not to.
• The charge God has placed on us to provide spiritual nurture, and opportunities for faith development for children. Research has proven that children who don’t grow up in a religious environment will rarely seek one out as they age. They simply won’t see a need or use for it, and they won’t know what they’re missing. We are responsible to make sure we share our faith, and introduce children to opportunities to participate in true Christian community.
• The impact church involvement can have on an older child, in terms of helping them navigate the difficulties and challenges of the teen years, and them avoiding such things as drug and alcohol abuse, and suicide.
• The impact the children’s experience of being in church has on their parents’ decision to attend, and to be involved in the life of the church.
• That for the entire first 15 minutes of the service, before the Children’s Message, and their departure to Sunday School, the children are pretty bored, and they’re asked to be patient while I speak mostly to the adults in the room, in language that for the most part, the younger ones don’t understand. I would ask that the adults extend that same patience to the children during their time in worship.
• The adults in the church have virtually unlimited opportunities to talk with me throughout the week. You can call me, email me, or ask for me to visit with you at any time, and I will do my very best to minister to you. For the most part, the children really only have that 10 minutes or so each week during the children’s message, to have access to their pastor. And there are usually more than a handful there who need my attention at the same time. Please value their time with me.

From time-to-time, people remark that they would like to be able to hear what the children are saying when they are up front with me in the sanctuary. Some even ask if it would be possible for the children to speak into a microphone.

I LOVE that many of you are interested in hearing what the children have to say! They are bright, and curious, and sometimes even funny!

I would ask you to consider the following that is also true:

The children need to experience their time with me, as time with their pastor. They need to feel free to be as authentic, honest, and open with me, as if we were alone together in that room, and the conversation was just between them, and their pastor. I don’t think that many of us adults would want to feel like a room full of people were “eavesdropping” on our conversations with our pastor – no matter how “confidential” the subject of the conversation was. Again, for most of these children, it is their only opportunity each week to talk with their pastor, and they value a sense of us having a private moment.
• Some children are intimidated by microphones, and many of them experience them as barriers to genuine relationship. They don’t like to feel as if they are on-stage, and they resent feeling like they are supposed to “entertain” the adults in worship. Other children see a microphone, and view it as an opportunity to entertain, and monopolize the time. Neither of those eventualities is very healthy, and I certainly wouldn’t want to foster either of those experiences.
• The people who sit in the front pews report that it is very easy for them to hear what the children are saying. I am confident that those folks would love to have you join them there! Most weeks, there is plenty of room.

Some people, from-time-to-time, have asked me what they are supposed to be doing when they’re not hearing or participating in the Children’s Message. May I offer the following ideas:

• On the off-chance that a child might glance your way, you could look interested, and engaged, and ready to offer them your beautiful smile.
• You could spend a few minutes alone with God, telling God how thankful you are for as many things you can list during that time. Remember to give thanks that there are children in the sanctuary, and that we have the opportunity to love them, and to teach them about God’s love and patience for us.

I hope that I have provided you a fuller understanding, a greater appreciation, and perhaps some food for thought regarding my rationale for the Children’s Message, and all that I am trying to accomplish in that brief 10 or so minutes during our time in worship. Please know that I am trying to balance a lot of competing priorities in that brief hour we share each week, and that I feel blessed to get to minister to many generations in this beautiful congregation. I love you all!

Blessings! Denise

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